A humorous look at what NOT to do when contacting potential clients.
Sure….I will throw in this disclaimer: The names and events used are made up, not real, etc. The names and incidents are the product of my twisted imagination. Any resemblance to actual events or persons living or dead is a coincidence.
Jane Smith has just returned from a successful networking conference in Phoenix. She shared many business cards and spoke to a number of potential clients. Now home, Jane is excited about following up post conference with one of her most promising leads. Let’s listen:
*ring *ring *ring *ring - click (goes to voicemail)
“Hi, you have reached the desk of Jennifer Doe (not her real name), I am either out of the office or on another call. Please leave a message after the beep and I will try to return your call within the next two hours”.
Professional Jane: “Good morning Jennifer. This is Jane Smith calling…we met at the XYZ Conference last weekend in Phoenix. I am just following up regarding our conversation about an upcoming project that you thought I might be interested in. I will be in my office for the remainder of the day and look forward to hearing from you. Have a great day!”
3 minutes later
*ring *ring *ring *ring - click (goes to voicemail)
“Hi, you have reached the desk of Jennifer Doe, I am either out of the office or on another call. Please leave a message after the beep and I will try to return your call within the next two hours”.
Embarrassed Jane: “Hi Jennifer, Jane Smith here again. I just realized that I did not leave the number where I could be reached. You can call me at (234) 555-1212. Thanks!”
1 day passes – Jane wonders why she hasn’t heard from Jennifer. Maybe she gave the wrong number? Maybe she should send an email? Hmmmmmm…..
Meanwhile….Jane locates @JenniferDoe on Twitter and is now following her. A request has also been sent to LinkedIn.
*ring *ring *ring *ring - click (goes to voicemail)
“Hi, you have reached the desk of Jennifer Doe, I am either out of the office ……blah, blah, blah…..the beep and I will try to return your call within the next two hours”.
Desperate Jane: “Good morning Jennifer, Jane Smith calling. I am sorry if I may have missed your call (totally lying – Jane has call display, she would know it if Jennifer called). I will definitely have my cell with me all day and would love to hear from you. You can call me at (234) 777-2323 or if it is more convenient, you can email me at jane.smith@.....”
Two days pass.
Frustrated AND Desperate Jane muses aloud: Darnit! We had such a great conversation at the XYZ Conference! She said I was perfect for the next project they were considering. I thought we had a connection. What to do..what to do. I wonder why she hasn’t returned my call? Maybe that storm that recently passed through Chicago affected their phone lines? Yes! That must be it…...it probably knocked out all of their voicemail and she likely hasn’t received my messages. I will email her AND then I will call her to make sure she knows I have sent the email.
*ring *ring *ring *ring - click (goes to voicemail) Darn!
“Hi, you have reached the desk of Jennifer Doe, I am either out of the office ………blather, blather, blather…..try to return your call within the next two hours”.
Jane (now known as Creepy Jane): “Hi Jennifer, this is Jane Smith calling. Hope you survived the storm…ha! ha! Anyway, no doubt my voice mail messages were lost in the power outages. I wanted to let you know that I sent an email to you with all of my contact information so that we could connect about that project you thought I might be perfect for. I am in between events right now…so it would be a perfect time! Have a great evening at the Opera! (Jane knows this because @JenniferDoe has tweeted that she will be attending the opera that evening and of course, Creepy Jane is following her tweets)”
Next Day
Crazy Jane muses aloud yet again: What the heck! Two hours my a$$! It has been 5 days since I first left that message and she hasn’t even had the courtesy to return my email. I KNOW she received it because I had flagged it with read receipt. I know she is in town – she tweeted she had an orthodontic appointment today. I have half a mind (yes you do Jane – you have LOST your mind) to give her a piece of my mind! When we spoke at XYZ Conference she basically offered me a job right then and there. I mean, of course there would be formalities involved, but I basically was a shoe in for the project. I don’t deserve to be treated like this. I am going to give her one more day and then….”
*ring *ring *ring *ring - click (goes to voicemail)
“Hi, you have reached the desk of Jennifer Doe, I am either out of the office or… yada, yada, yada ……..within the next two hours”.
Psychotic Jane….sobbing, “Jennifer, this is Jane calling. I apologize for the tears, but I am very upset that I haven’t heard from you….I thought we had a connection. I have discussed our relationship with my therapist and he said that I would feel better if I have some closure. PLEASE call me…anytime day or night!”
So.....I have to ask....do any of you know a Jane?
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